There was a time when I didn't know Jude. But then one day I met Jude, and no matter how hard you try, you cannot unmeet Jude. The Jude abides. A lovely leech, a tantalizing tick, the band-aid that never lost its stick; Jude adheres. The paradisal parasite, Jude is the worm in my apple; rich and earthen, he's the shit that makes my garden grow.
Jude sticks, but I have learned if I know what's best for me, I gotta stick to Jude. Since moving back to New Orleans, Jude has been my most lucrative hook-up, with his twinkly eye, his gleeful gait, his mangled mane, ponying up (at around 3 pm) to settle the demands of each new day....Jude proves a better hook-up than any of my friends' lawyer-daddies, with their aura of legal reprieve and lure of daddy-start-up-capital, only made possible after hours of strained listening, patronizing that poses as deference, and the humbling act that is lip service. (I don't need money to blog--this is not a shoe store.) Jude lacks start-up-capital, but he's got Just-Add-Jude miracle grow. Jude is free-of-charge, he only asks that you donate your time--a straight-up chillin' fee.
What is Jude's magic? He is omniscient. He knows you, he knows your dog, he knows your mom, and they know him too. Your dad doesn't know him (but that's your dad). And what else? Jude was always here. Back when the poboy first defaulted on his payments. When the levee was only bruised, and the Corps of Engineers were still in school. Before the word, there was Jude. If myth comes before man, then Jude came before myth. Jude is legend--but he wants you to know Bra, I'm real(?).
Jude is a local muse for aspiring and actual musicians, artists, filmmakers--and everybody else. Chris Rose, pre-crack up, conducted one of his famous sixty-second interviews with Jude. (If anybody can find it, please let me know.) Jude is a video correspondent for DNO Video, directing and starring in videos such as Jude is Christmas, Jude Gets a Camera, Jude Goes to Thanksgiving, and my favorite, Jude and the Poboy, embedded below. Check it out; a really lovely slice of life.
DNO VIDEO - Jude and the Poboy from DNO VIDEO on Vimeo.
He also models in Terrence Sanders's latest issue of Art Voices Magazine.
At the center of history-making, Jude might be the Forrest Gump of New Orleans, except not retarded.
But don't think Jude is just around for your benefit. Jude amuses, but he also be mused. Jude is the thing itself. Jude is our mother, we must take care of her.
Still think you don't know Jude? You do, you just don't realize it yet. Jude is intuitive, instinctual. Jude is under your skin, in your bones. But if you'd like to meet your maker, I have some suggestions:
Tips for How to Get to Know Jude:
First off, Jude's hours: available from 12 AM til'
Now, You:
--Hang out at The Saint.
--Drop by Pal’s for the coldest Miller High Life in town.
--Cross that river, and pay that toll for weekly Westbank Thursdays, where you can catch Jude eating pho cuz' he likes the way it tastes.
--Never miss a day of reading my blog, where info about Jude is known to pop up pretty regularly.
--If you're really anxious, post a comment below with your name and number and Jude will get back to you.
Bye bye for now. Until Jude...
2 comments:
as a matter of fact, I do know Jude. I may have even been a wee bit overserved the other night, and confronted him, with regards to his slightly bulging belly. I, as many others who grace the rue of magazine with their presence on a regular basis, have an affinity for the Jude. My dear friend and the Jude have also ben shacking up recently, but that is neither here nor there. In conclusion, I do know the Jude, I dig the Jude, and if you haven't noticed, within the past 7 seconds I have made the executive desicion that he is no longer just Jude, but the Jude.
this is my first time.
Kate, this is the best blog I have ever read. You keep ones like this coming and you're set! 4319 ya heard.
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